About Me

• I'm too cheap to buy cookie crisp so I just buy small cookies instead and eat those for breakfast
• I have the best pair of slippers ever, they are killer rabbit slippers
• I'm scared of religious fanatics
• I think it's BS that a diner will charge 75¢ more to grill a cheese sandwich
  
• I think the tasting paper in Willy Wonka's factory is just acid paper and the whole movie was just a bad trip
• Mannequins are the scariest things in the world when they are not in stores but are popping out of bushes on the street at night
  

Quotes

• "Know how useful you are? You're about as useful as a ping pong ball in a hurricane"
• "Shot shards of shrapnel"
• "I like your shirt. Thanks, I couldn't decide which one to wear so I wore both "
• "I just took a spin class and my vagina feels like it's on fire"
• "Now what's the deal with- SHUTUP!!"
  

New T-Shirt

I have a very dry and twisted sense of humor but for $5 I couldn't resist. On the back there's an 11. I guess it was a funeral home sponsored softball team or maybe even a little league team. After a little google search I found out that there is a Scalia Funeral Home in Staten Island. One of the best $5 I ever spent.